designed life list

Long List: Designed Life Literary Awards

The List is finally here, the entries are set.

On the 30th of May 2017, we would announce 3 Award winners and a shortlist of entries for the CFW EMagazine June Edition. Each entry will be published on design.life website and it would reflect on the facebook page of Designed Life.

To Win, awardees should find their story or poem on the facebook page and tag their friends to share and drop a positive review as a comment. The highest number of shares,  positive reviews and scores from the judges would win. The reviews should be comments that actually show that the story or poem was read, one-word comments like “great, awesome” will not be valid.

Writers should remember to ask their friends to like the post and the page before sharing and commenting, this is the only way to validate the number of shares. It proves that the writer did not just share his own posts, we will also be monitoring the shares and any writer who shares their own post automatically gets disqualified.

THE LONG LIST:

Fiction

  1. About a broken Family by David Adewusi
  2. The other tent by Nifemi SOLA-OJO
  3. The Prison by MOBOLAJI OLANREWAJU
  4. Shadow (Enemy of the dark) by  BABATUNDE BABWALE BABAFEMI
  5. 1814 by Olanrewaju Olamide
  6. Parted Company by Okafor Abigail Ekene
  7. The Apocalypse by Favour Onuoha
  8. Ekioba by Erhu Amreyan
  9. Mornie Alantie by EZEANI UCHE
  10. Path of Brimstone by David Lein Victor
  11. We’d Meet in Damar by Luqman Isa Morrison
  12. Haunted by Ogbonnaya Iheke Ogbonnaya
  13. Twist by James Eneojile
  14. Dear ol’ Granny by Jeff Emmanuel
  15. The Short end of a stick by Adewale Fasipe
  16. Blank Roses by Ekomobong Monday
  17. Bile by Gideon Chukwuemeka Ogbonna
  18. What’s the Use by Pamela Nwakaego Okpala
  19. Buried in\time by Akinyemi Muhammed— Princely X
  20. We belong together by Ayodeji Oluwaseyi Isaac

Poetry

  1. Dear Ife: A plea for love by OJO TAIYE
  2. For Broken Orphans by Amao Williams Praise
  3. Mortal Treasure by Manson Akaduh
  4. Night Boy by Epidi Leonard Oreoluwa
  5. Baba is a Glutton by Ololade Akinlabi
  6. The Widow by Chuks Obi
  7. Easter with house spinster by Izunna Okafor

Entrants who paid to send in their entries should remember to send their details to hello@designed.life for refunds, attach evidence of payments.

Designed life caught up with Kyshira S. Moffett MBA,  the founder and Chief Bombshell Officer of The KSM Group. She is a global brand strategist with expertise in digital engagement. She is also the founder of Life of a Bombshell Cosmetics and author of Bombshell of All Trades.  She is a woman living an authentically designed life filled with passion and with strategy. 

 

What habits and mindsets helped make you successful?

Learning to discipline myself early on was key. I learned to do what I had to do, not what I felt like doing. Accomplishing your goals is not an easy process, especially if they relate to advancing your life forward. Establishing firm time management processes and systems for my business were key to my growth.

How did you distinguish yourself from your competitors?

My brand is rooted in my personality. Sure there are tons of brand strategist and bloggers out there but I believe I was uniquely made from God and I allowed the traits I was given to shine through. I provide serious content but it’s dressed up in pink font, italic letters, and fun photos. I’ve never believed that business has to be boring. Those who have followed me from day one can attest that my personality shines through.What was your biggest mistake?

What was your biggest mistake?

Waiting too long to move. I sat on so many ideas out of fear and watched so many others propel themselves to success by simply trying. Too often we get paralyzed by fear not realizing that that failure is apart of the process.

How do you learn from failure or setbacks?

I look to evaluate the situation. What went wrong? What went right? What was beyond my control? Could I have prevented something from happening? This actually shifted how I set goals. I now try to anticipate challenges and constraints before they occur.

What are the most crucial things you have done to grow your business?

The single most crucial thing I’ve done is remain consistent. Truthfully I wasn’t very consistent early on. But I noticed the results once I shifted my routine. Everyone starts off strong but that doesn’t last very long. Slow and steady win the race. I’ve been consistently present for my audience for nearly 4 years now. That earns a different level of trust.

What three pieces of advice would you offer entrepreneurs starting out today?

1) Identify your unique value proposition early on

2) Save your personal money and then invest it in your business

3) Don’t let fear hold you back.

What plans do you have for expansion?

I recently launched Life of a Bombshell Cosmetics, a luxury online cosmetics business. I’ve been planning for this for over a year and I am so excited that is finally here. I want to grow this business to become a global entity. I also want to expand my professional speaking. In 2015, I had 15 national engagements and I hope to expand that. I love speaking at workshops and conferences and I want to seek more of those opportunities. Lastly, I’ve always wanted to be an author. I am excited to share that my first book Bombshell of All Trades is now available for pre-sale and will officially be available on June 12th. You can find it at thisishermovement.com/bombshellofalltrades and on Amazon.

How has being an entrepreneur affected your family life?

It hasn’t much actually. I am not married and I don’t have children. My parents and remainder of the family live in a different state but they are supportive.

What motivates you?

To be honest, being sick and tired of my circumstances. I want more for myself so I’m going out to get it.

What makes you happy?

Helping other people follow their passions. Nothing will ever replace the 1:1 client experience for me. The feeling of helping someone walk in their purpose is invaluable.

What sacrifices have you had to make to be a successful entrepreneur?

Time, money, relationships, sleep, you name it.

How do you define success? Success is personal for everyone. For

Success is personal for everyone. For me, it’s about impact and change. Everything that I do, I want it to have an impact. Even the cosmetics line. For many women, makeup has an emotional impact. It can brighten your day and add pep to your step. I want to continue to create products and experiences that people will remember.

How do you live an authentic life?

I stay prayed up and trust God to guide me.

What does living a Designed Life mean to you?

It means being intentional about the decisions I make, maximizing opportunities in front of me and letting my bombshell light shine.

bombshell

Kyshira S. Moffett MBA,  is the founder and Chief Bombshell Officer of The KSM Group. She is a global brand strategist with expertise in digital engagement. She is also the founder of Life of a Bombshell Cosmetics and author of Bombshell of All Trades. You can learn more about her full book of brands here. Kyshira has previous experience as an HR Professional within the financial services industry and higher education. Kyshira is a proud graduate of Hampton University. During her tenure at Hampton, Kyshira garnered six different corporate internships with companies such as PricewaterhouseCoopers, Morgan Stanley, and PNC Financial Services Group. She was also selected from an exclusive pool for an 18-month fellowship with Management Leadership for Tomorrow (MLT) where she enhanced her business acumen and participated in seminars with corporate executives. Additionally while at Hampton, Kyshira joined Zeta Phi Beta Sorority, Inc. where she honed her leadership skills and learned the value of sisterhood and volunteerism.

Currently Kyshira is very active within the Greater Pittsburgh community. She was elected president of the Urban League Young Professionals of Greater Pittsburgh in 2015. In January 2017, she was elected president of the National Black MBA Association, Pittsburgh Chapter. Kyshira is an alum of the Coro Pittsburgh Women in Leadership Program and New Leaders Council Pittsburgh. Kyshira was named a 2014 Western Pennsylvania Rising Star by Get Involved, Inc. In 2015, she was featured in the inaugural edition of Who’s Who of Black Pittsburgh as well as named  one of the top 20 career bloggers of 2015 and in 2016, was named one of Pittsburgh’s Fab40. 

You can find out more about this bombshell by visiting her online: theksmgroup.com (brand firm) thisishermovement.com (blog) lifeofabombshell.com (cosmetics biz)

 

christians find rest

Rest and Reflect

Over the past week, I have realized that many Christians are going through a season of PRESSING. You might be feeling burdened down a bit or even having a lot on your mind. I want you to know YOU ARE IN A GREAT PLACE. You are in a place of walking into the greatest moments of your life. The enemy wouldn’t be messing with you or bothering you if you weren’t a threat! You have to really sit back and reflect on what the Lord has done for you. You may have faced many secret battles and public battles. Just know you are never alone.

The enemy is hating on you in a big way. He doesn’t want you to find out what it means to really walk with the Lord. He doesn’t want you to learn who you are in Christ especially during your season of singleness. Guess what?! He is already defeated and if you don’t give up! You will see what God promised you in every area of your life. I want you to know that you must continue standing on the word of God. You must use your spiritual weapon of rest as you walk through this season.

What God is Saying

During my quiet time with the Lord God kept telling me that my children need to rest. God stated to me that many of us are trying to fight battles and we are exhausted. God is saying he has your back! You don’t have to fall or give into the enemy’s lies. God sees what you have been through and what you are going through. In order to win the battle, you are in you must rest. When you rest it doesn’t mean you have no power or authority. Also, don’t feel bad when you rest. I know it looks impossible to rest because there are so many things to do each day. Take a step back. I want you to stop questioning and I want you to just breathe.

Jesus wants to teach you how to walk with him. This key scripture came into my heart during my quiet time.

Matthew 11:30 NIV

For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

 

The burdens you are carrying will crush you if you don’t give it to God. The weights and the questions may seem unanswered, but let it go. Give it to God and just stand in the place of worship. Continue to stand in that place of faith. People around you may not understand and guess what it’s okay! God is leading you into a new land! Just PRESS THROUGH!

Take time this week to reflect and rest! Find time this week to look at your season of singleness as a gift. Take time to look at the faithfulness of God! THAT IS THE KEY TO MOVE INTO THE NEXT LEVEL OF GLORY!

Here are a few key points that can help you as you reflect during your pressing season.

Rest Key Points:

  • You can’t figure it all out. Just let everything go and give every concern over to God. Whatever you keep thinking about over and over again. You will just exhaust yourself. Let father God take hold of each situation. Just tell God what is on your heart. You are never alone. Let God into every area. Just rest into his arms. Just sit with him.
  • Thank God for what you do have. The best place to be to enter into a mindset of rest with God is to thank him.
  • It’s okay to sit back after you have done what you were supposed to and just rest. Don’t allow people to make you feel bad for your me + Jesus time. You need special moments with God to energize yourself. You need personal time with the Lord to reflect.
  • Rest in prayer with the Lord. Sometimes, you just need time to lay on your face and really surrender everything to the Lord. He wants you whole and complete in him alone. Don’t talk so much, but work on during this season to listen and receive.
  • If you don’t know where to begin to rest. Just sit with your favorite healthy snack and talk with God. He just wants to hear your voice. Simple steps bring big progress!

Reflect Key Points:

  • Look back on what the Lord has done in your past. If you keep focusing on what you don’t have you won’t have the heart you need to really receive what the Lord wants you to receive. If you focus on what God has done you will start seeing he hasn’t left you!
  • Write down what the Lord has done. Write it down in a journal or personal tablet. You have to write down blessings and what God has done so you can have a visual. You have to have some type of memorial memories of what the Lord has done. So, when you have moments that seem like God is taking a while. You can look back and say WOW he did it for me a while back and I know he will do it again!
  • Don’t get bitter when other people get blessings that you wanted. Just know that God has allowed each test to come for a reason. God has specific blessings for each of us. Don’t worry or be afraid when things take a while. Just reflect and know that God is fighting for you.

 

REFLECTION AND THANKFULNESS COMBINED ARE POWERFUL!!!!

 

20 SOCIAL ETIQUETTES YOU SHOULD ADHERE TO

Many people find it very difficult to criticize an opinion without being ethnocentric and insulting. There are some ways to criticize and make your own opinion in a polite manner. Social etiquette is very useful in public places, gatherings, social outings, and on social media, etc. The absence of social etiquette makes so many young people act terrible and hold on to absurd lifestyles.

A list of social etiquettes you should consider:

1. Say “I am sorry” when you are wrong and don’t hesitate to correct erring friends.

2. Don’t disturb others with the noise emanating from home theater, music players, and mobile phones.

3. Your ability to say ‘thank you’ goes a long way. The hands stretched to you deserve a simple thank you, don’t underestimate any good deeds.

4. Stay reserved and don’t jump into conversations you have not been invited to join.

5. Eat decently; The habit of disposing and dumping waste anyhow doesn’t add to your value.

6. Don’t practice African time, be punctual. Time is the most precious valuable anyone can have. When you have an appointment with someone, always make it at that time.

7. Respect other people privacy. It is very disrespectful to bump into someone house, bag, and closet without proper consent from the person.

8. Watch your tongue, don’t just address anyone anyhow even if you are rich. You still have to be courteous with your words to everyone you meet. The tongue can make or mar anyone, so let it speak good things.

9. Amy Vanderbilt said in his book and I quote “it is axiomatic that as we mature and grow in years and experience we must be able to meet more demanding social situations with confidence and ease.” Just as you grow, it is expected of you to add more to your principles, knowledge as well. Don’t be too proud to learn.

10. Don’t scream in public places because you are over excited. You never can tell if someone standing beside you is hypertensive.

11. If you are in a hall or cinema and you unknowingly sit on someone else’s seat, The best you can do is to give respect and stand up. People have this saying of “so far I didn’t meet anyone there, I have the right to sit down”. We have people with myriad and different opinions. In order not to create an unnecessary fight, stand and leave. It gives you respect you don’t even know you deserve.

12. Use deodorants generously. It sucks when you sit beside someone on the bus and you just have to use your handkerchief to cover your nose.

13. Courtesy demands you greet when you enter a shop, kiosk, small or large offices.

14. Learn to give regards. When you know the source of an object, articles, you must give reference by giving regards. This is very applicable to social media; many people plagiarize posts anyhow without acknowledging the writer which is also wrong.

15. Table manners are important when you eat with other people. You don’t talk while eating, you don’t hit your elbows on the table while eating, and you don’t make noise with your plates because you are eating. It shows a lack of manners!

16. A Loud throat clearing is very wrong in public, it irritates!

17. Say please, it shows how important your request is to you.

18. Shouting and raising your voice when you are on the phone is uncouth. keep your voice down!

19. Maintain a queue and don’t disorganise it when you are in the bank, canteen, malls or any public gathering.

20. There are still more, but I have to round it up with this last one which is; don’t invade someone else privacy by checking their phones.

Losses are part of life

WHY YOU SHOULD EMBRACE LOSSES, THE TWIST.

EMBRACE IT

A loss is the exact opposite of profit. Profit is said to be the benefit that yields from things we’ve dedicated out time, passion, money and so many others things that are precious to us. Loss, on the other hand, is defined as that thing, person, contract, non-living things you lose.

There is some indispensable significance of losses, there are some things you have to let go in your life. It doesn’t mean you are not determined to have that thing or pursue it in life, it only means you can everything good to yourself alone.

In the principle of life, bad things happen to both the good and the bad. The principle of life does not distinguish anyone saint in the journey called life. Good people die, bad people die, good people experience accidents, bad people do as well, good people cry, bad people also cry. A phenomenon question people have cultivated the habit of saying is that “why do bad thing happen to good people?’. And my answer is, “the principle of life doesn’t know if you are good or not, only human distinguish between the good and the bad.

Now, talking about losses, the good people also experience losses in the journey called life. The road to stardom tells more about this topic. Life is hard, success is hard. You have to give it all your best, and at times, your best may not really work out.

Moving on to the past, research has proven it that almost every successful person has some past (clean or dirty), but you don’t get to know they do not until they tell you about it. What helped? Was it that easy for them? Do they have pains you’ve got? Do they have stigmas as well? Of course, they only applied the principle of letting go. The fact about past is, the most you reminiscence on it, it makes you lose focus of the future.

10 indispensable significance of losses.

  1. It makes you strong: Those that have battled with so many stigmas in life are always strong to face the future. In the actual sense of letting go, such person becomes stronger than before. When you have experienced some things in your life, to face such occurrence in the future would never make you inferior but superior.
  2. The act of letting go becomes an innate habit for you: You find it very easy to let go of some other thing too, because you have once tasted the sourness of letting go.
  3. More experienced: One of the major significance of losses to mankind is that it makes more experienced. For instance, if it was to be a business loss, it is of veracity that that loss would make one thinks very well before dabbling into another.
  4. You understand life better, the realities of life reveal itself to you.
  5. You look for so many alternatives to move on
  6. It makes you think big.
  7. You become a motivator to others. You will become a godfather to other young and aspiring entrepreneur.
  8. You become more creative than before.
  9. Losses open other means. It proves Martin Luther King right in one of his quote. He said and I quote “difficulties shouldn’t mar you, let it make you”.
  10. It makes you trace your step back to your path. At times, the main reason why something fails in our lives is a result of we deviating from focus, and no man gets to the top without having focus.
tolerance the different pieces on the board

Tolerance: a necessary spice for lasting marriage

I once stayed with three other ladies in a room for a month; it’s an experience worth remembering anytime and any day. It seems so difficult for ladies of the different race to stay in the same room for something close to a month without causing chaos and nursing grudges but I stayed with these ladies peacefully.

The magic was just tolerance. We tolerated each other’s shortcomings, tolerated each other’s faults, we tolerated each other’s wrongs, etc. The number of things we had in common could not measure up to the ones we didn’t have in common. That ought to have caused so much noise in the room every day.

Where am I heading to? What am I trying to deduce? It is simple. It is straight. The tolerance we apply in a relationship would no doubt make so life works out well. We don’t find so many things easy; we are all tolerating them and each other.

Tolerance in marriage is very important and very significant.

It makes the partners understand themselves and give the deserved respect to one another. The husband snores, you don’t snore and you don’t like it. The wife doesn’t cook some food because it makes her vomit, and those are the ones you like. The husband likes the light on at night, you don’t like it. You wife likes the fan on, you don’t. If care is not taken, this husband and wife cannot live happily.

This is when tolerance comes in, you must be able to tolerate one another to avoid frequent scuffle. Strive to make peace at every slight mistake and apologise almost immediately. So far the both of you were not raised by the same parent, you should expect differences. Children that were nursed and tutored by the same parent don’t behave the same way; so, don’t expect that from those that were raised by different parents.

Tolerance shouldn’t come in some aspects in marriage; let it work in all aspects of marriage. The best of marriages you see are not perfect; they only tolerate those things divorced couples couldn’t tolerate. You have to learn to tolerate some shortcomings from your partner if you want a peaceful marriage. Human beings are not perfect, your imperfection cannot look appealing to everyone but it must definitely look to your partner and let it vice versa.

 

 

Parenting care and children needs

5 Ways to Improve Your Parenting Skills, win your child’s trust.

Parenting goes beyond bearing offspring or providing the basic needs of the children. It encapsulates care, affection, nursing, educating, etc. Parenting these days is only maintained to the level of provision and procreation. No one really cares about showing care, and this has resulted in populating the world with children that become a menace. Most times children who go out and constitute a nuisance are a product of lack of good parenting.

Children need a lot of care, especially the girl child. Girls get to a stage in life where they become secretive. A girl is abused and threatened not to tell anyone, some fear that they will get killed.  Such a girl will be afraid of so many things apart from the threat and abuse. This could make young girls become reclusive. It affects her academically (poor performance), socially (anti-social behaviors), physically (undue weight loss), emotionally.

It takes a good and caring parent to notice all these in her because she won’t tell anyone she is going through some things. There are guidelines to follow as a parent:

  1. Quality Time:

    Spend quality time with your child. Children open up to someone that pays attention to their feelings. Many folks think only relationships or marriage needs TIME as a factor that will keep them going which is not true. Children also need time from parents, there should be a time where both parents should sit down with the child and have some fun. Talking with children could be difficult because of the generation gap but we just need to make it happen.

  1. Satisfy their inquisitiveness:

    Children are known to be very inquisitive and that is how God has created them to be. They always like to know everything; even the things you don’t expect them to know are the things they ask. Shunning them is like telling them you don’t care. Make sure you satisfy their inquisitiveness even if they are childish questions. But do you that those questions to them are not childish, they feel on top of the world when they find an answer(s) to their long time aspiring question(s).

  1. Questions:

    Ask them those questions about everything you need to know. Don’t be too busy to create time for them. Ask about their day at school, what was taught in school, how easily they could grasp their subjects. When you ask these questions, there is nothing that would make them feel inferior among their friends, they would not have any reason to be covetous or pick bad habits.

  1. Correction with love:

    When you correct a child with love, such child would find it very easy to discuss anything that bothers the child. Children relate with love, they understand the language called love than most adults. How do you expect a girl that was abused to open to you when you scream at her at any slight mistake she makes? She cannot, she will not.

  1. Call a spade a spade:

    Many parents do not teach girls enough about sex and sexuality, and teenage pregnancy is a geometric progression in recent times. Some parents think sex education makes the children indulge, but statistics prove that reverse is the case. Girls are taught in the wrong places eventually.

 

how to move on

HOW TO DEAL WITH A PARTNER THAT HASN’T MOVED ON WITH HIS/HER EX

Many times, some people find it very difficult to move on after they’ve been hurt by love, they find it hard to fall in love again and might be aloof in an existing relationship. Others might find it hard to fall in love again. If you are unlucky enough to be dating a person still strung up on their EX, then we have some tips that could possibly help you. Dating such person can make you feel inferior especially when he or she constantly talks about an ex every time. You might get jealous but you don’t want to leave because you are sincerely in love. The truth is they can still love but it takes time, so what are the things to look out for? How can you help with the “healing” process? Or better still you might scrap all this and just walk away.

joao-silas-114301

Don’t know if your partner hasn’t moved on with an ex?

There are signs to look out for:

• Talks about the ex every time you are together
• Checks the ex every time on social media, calls, and with text messages.
• Feels happy talking about the ex.
• A little scuffle would always result in ‘had it been it was my ex’
• Would never want you to have any relationship with his/her family

Now, having noticed these signs, the next plan of action, if you must, is to help your partner get over an ex. A partner that doesn’t get over an ex, brings stagnancy to the relationship they are presently in.

How to GET THE SPRUNG OUT!

• The best way to deal with your partner is to have a one on one conversation. Communicate about how you feel, ask questions politely, and just simply discuss.
• When you ask questions about the ex, make sure they are not questions that make it seem like your partner shouldn’t care about them. Don’t say ‘why can’t you just get over them? or what is it that interests you this much that you can’t get over it?’ Such questions could make your partner get upset and would possibly shut them up.
• When the ex-lover comes into a conversation, redirect the conversation to your present relationship.
• Spend quality time with your partner, get to know why the ex-lover is so important to them.
• Crack jokes with the ex’s name involved and yours. Making light of the situation reduces tension
• Because your partner hasn’t gotten over the ex-lover doesn’t give you an excuse to create a close relationship with your own ex-lover. A healthy relationship cannot survive on revenge.
• Ask questions from your partner’s friends about their former lover. Ask simple questions about them and what makes your partner still hung up on the relationship etc.
• Talk about the future with him. Know their plans for the relationship.
• Give it time. Don’t be in a haste to quit when you know he is yet to move on.

matheus-ferrero-173415

If all of these fails then MOVE ON

I believe a man or woman might find it hard to move on from a relationship but it’s not in our place to force someone to love us. If all else fails, take a walk! Do not manipulate, cajole, or coerce anyone to love you. Real relationships are never forced or are they ever based on pretense.

Pedophiles and Child molesters should be Tagged, Labeled, and Imprisoned.

When I was about 9 years old my dad’s bank account manager who was definitely over 30 years old wanted me to date him! I was only 9 years old.
He promised he would take care of me and buy me things but I should not tell my dad. I told him I didn’t need anything that my dad gives me all that I need.
At 10, a random uncle in Ilorin tried to make a pass, told me to lay close to him… I escaped the pedophile and ran for my life. So many instances of teachers, uncles, random old men trying to steal my innocence but I always will run from them. I count myself lucky to have lived in Nigeria for 17 years of my life and escaped molestation. But some girls are not that lucky, poverty and limited education is a contributing factor in some cases. Nuclear family settings, open door policies, and culture is another factor.
I knew a girl who was impregnated at 13 years old by a man 3 times her age. He lured her with mango and candy. I have heard of men promising little 15 years old girls higher education in exchange for marriage. These girls lose their childhood to vagabonds and men thirsty for control. They are thrust into adulthood unknowingly and most times unwillingly.


We’ve got to do more about the girl child, to protect her and stop the circle of molestation and early marriage.
We should not be clouded by religion and be too blind to see what’s going on around us.  
How can a society highly suppressed by religion and culture be hypersexualized?. The simple answer is that we are not paying ATTENTION to our children. There is a cesspool of immorality that lingers in everything from our schools, to our homes. Parents are nonchalant about the daily dealings of their children. They are left to watch porn in the name of reality tv and tv programmings.They are subjected to listening to highly sexual music that teaches boys that women are tools to be used to fulfill their itch. They are taught to see women as whores. They watch their dad’s slap their moms to tame her like a dog.
You leave your daughters with uncle’s and neighbors to watch. Do you know what they are doing with them? Houseboys and house girls even drivers in your home have too much access to your children.
You ignore the signs in the name of culture. You don’t talk to them, you don’t ask questions, you don’t monitor their behaviors, you are busy chasing irrelevance.

tim-trad-215254

I watch my son’s with keen interest, we don’t allow sleepovers, I monitor what they watch even cartoons.
When I bath them I tell them to wash their privates themselves. That’s me! I pay attention. I don’t want to nurse wounds in their adulthood that I should have ensured never happened.

Questionable behaviors amongst siblings should be corrected. Unacceptable plays or games should not be allowed in your home.
When kids come over, I make.sure they play in the open no closed doors. Don’t allow men bathe your daughters, even their own brothers or fathers especially after a certain age. Start teaching them that it’s not okay to be touched inappropriately.

les-anderson-202336
Stop sending your kids off to family members and friends to stay for long periods. We’ve got to start educating our kids what is not acceptable. Ask them questions, pay attention.
Provide the basics so they can’t be lured. The problem isn’t the age gap, it doesn’t matter if it’s between a 6 years old and a 10 years old. Parents must do better but there is a special place in Hades for pedophiles who prey on the innocent child.

Pedophiles and child molesters should be tagged, labeled, and imprisoned.

The government must bring sexual offenders to justice, pedophiles and child molesters should be tagged, labeled, and imprisoned. There should not be any room to abhor them and encourage bad behaviors. The government must create a system that calls for child-friendly programming and the movie industry must do their part. Schools must keep an eye out for changes in a child’s behavior that points to both physical and sexual abuse, they must have an avenue to record and report these cases. Parents must protect their children and report cases of sexual abuse to the right authority. We must fight not just for the girl child but for all children. They deserve to be children and not victims of sexual, physical, and emotional abuse and neglect. We as a society have to say NO to sexual abuse of any kind and fight to create a safe environment for our children.

 

Written by: Vivian Okojie

 

You are 28 years old and not married yet?!?!

Sometimes, life happens and some situations are out of your control. No matter what I want you to know that the Lord is good and his timing is sufficient for you. I am not knocking anyone right now who is seriously engaged or married. I am not knocking anyone who has gotten married at an early age. I am just speaking from my point of view. I noticed that sometimes this world and even people close to you have opinions about your life. They may even suggest you do certain things so you can get attention or maybe even a date. Yes, God sends great people into your life to help you or give advice, but we still need to seek the Lord. We need to know what He has told us and wait on Him no matter what people say. Sometimes, people who love us tell us stuff from the goodness of their heart, but we still need to follow what the Lord has said in his word. We still must follow what we know God is telling us to do deep from within no matter how long we may have to wait.

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I am currently 28 years old and I have realized that there is so much out there in the world that could discourage almost anyone about marriage especially Godly marriages.

Thank God we serve a God that wants us to view marriage from His point of view and from His perspective! I love to spend time with the Lord and have my quiet time. It really encourages my soul. Sometimes, this world wants you to rush in every area of your life and not even consult God about anything. I strongly believe that marriage is a beautiful gift from the Lord and if you have a desire for marriage it will happen at the Lord’s time according to his will. I am noticing so many people getting married at an early age. I think there is nothing wrong with it as long as the Lord has ordained it and willed it. I just believe that sometimes some singles as they get older can be discouraged or feel as if something is wrong with them. I want you to know that if you have ever felt like that it’s okay. The Lord understands how you feel, but there is nothing wrong with you. He just has a certain time for every area of your life. (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 CEB) He has reasons that are beyond your understanding as well. He is a good father and He wants only the best for you.

I told God about 5 years ago that I would wait for the God fearing husband that He has for me. I would wait no matter how long it would take. I told God I would wait well and focus on my kingdom purpose. I wouldn’t wait around with a defeated mindset, but I would trust His timing for every area of my life.

I want you to look at your life right now and not your friend’s life. I want you to look at your life right now no matter how old you are and realize how good God is. I want you to look at your life right now and filter out everything that anyone has ever told you that doesn’t line up with what GOD said. I want you to look at your life right now and start really enjoying it. You may have situations that seem unfair or you may still be questioning God’s timing for your life. I want you to put aside your questions and really rejoice in the Lord in this season. No matter what stage you are in just rejoice! I want you to know that being in the season of singleness isn’t a time to wallow in self-pity or wonder why no one has asked to court you yet. Also, I want you to strongly know that there is more to life than wanting to be married. It is a magnificent desire, but at the same time, we don’t want to ever idolize it.
We don’t want to put it over God or even God’s love for us. I want you to take time out to talk with the Lord when you feel as if nothing is changing fast enough for you. I want you to always be real with God when you do feel lonely or even down. God understands, but at the same time don’t stay in that place. There are billions of things to do and if you need help to grow ask the Lord to send you God fearing people in your life to mingle with. The Lord is good at setting up friendships and also comforting his children.samantha-sophia-210754

You are NEVER alone even if your feelings tell you otherwise.

I have had times in my life where people have asked me if I am dating someone. I quickly say no and move on with the conversation in a graceful way. I am not shocked by how society wants us to feel. I just know what the Lord has told me. I have also had great conversations with people who are waiting on the Lord as well. It has encouraged me to keep focused on the Lord and to smile because we all have feelings! I want you to look at your life in a different way today. I want you to look at your accomplishments with the Lord and take a deep breath! Thank Him for His goodness and also enjoy every lesson you learn during your single season.
I have also realized that it’s okay to enjoy my single season. I want you to know that you don’t have to be afraid that you will be single forever. Look at your season through a kingdom perspective. No one will ever be able to complete you like God can. Yes, at the Lord’s time someone will compliment you, but he still won’t be perfect. If you think that someone will be able to do all God can do. You may need to do more reflecting and allow God to really work inside of your heart. We have to let God mature us and not get down to the point of desperation. The Lord is working right now on it all, but all you have to do is trust him. If the Lord helped you before don’t you think he will do it again? (Proverbs 3:5-6)

matheus-ferrero-176140I know life is full of surprises but enjoy the ride. Just make sure that you let God into the areas of your heart that still needs growth and healing. (Psalm 147:3)

He isn’t mean He is just working it all out for your good. (Romans 8:28) Remember it’s okay to still be single at whatever age. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. Don’t rush past God’s specific time. He will reveal it all to you when you are ready. Prepare your heart to serve others and constantly focus on seeking him. He is above your questions and even your feelings. His timing is perfect and He knows exactly what He is doing.